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Jury Fury/Transcript
(Intro) Announcer: Bum b-b-bum bum bum! Birdena is suing Turdsley for trespassing in her yard and squishing her garden. Judge Mia: Order order order order order order order in the- Nut: Stop the case! gasps Mia: Nut, what is the meaning of this? Nut: Terribly sorry, your honor, but it has come to my attention that your courtroom does not meet the new law. gasps Mia: What new law?! Nut: Judicial Bill 17-30, it was just passed this morning. He hem. Let me read from section one: There shall be a jury in every court! gasps Mia: A jury? Nut: That's right. But I've already taken the liberty of putting one up for you. Jury: Hi. Mia: Were they even there before? Wait a minute. Does this mean that I don't get to make the decisions anymore? Nut: That's right. From now on you'll be more of a...decoration. gasps Mia: Nut, please! I hate this new law! Do something! Anything! Nut: Sorry, but the law is the law. ON WITH THE CASE! Mia: Grrrrr... Ginger, as a Jury Member: I know we'll be the best of friends. Don't you? Birdena: I came here to sue a snot-nosed little brat! Not to listen to this court sitcom! Mia: Ah, yes. Birdena, please tell us what happened. Birdena: Ladies and gentleman of the jur''aaaaayyy'' Mia: Hey! You're supposed to tell me what happened! Ginger, as a Jury Member: Not anymore! Birdena: Mia, just pipe down. I'm trying to tell the jury. Ladies and gentleman of the jur''aaaaayyy''...I was a poor, elderly woman, tending my garden one day. But than this...BAFOON! gasps Trampled across the fence and squished my poor vegetables! They're my only source of food. I don't believe in going to the grocery store. Anyway, I am just suing for my vegetables back...and also a trillion billion dollars. I think you'll all agree that that is a fair punishment. Thank you, I have no more. Jury: Oh, ya, sounds reasonable. Mia: That's not even a real number! Pinceone, as a Jury Member: Mia, we rule the courthouse now, not you. Mia: But- Nut: Listen to the jury, Mia Mia: So unfair! break Jury: Guilty. Guilty, guilty, guilty. Mia: Why do they get to decide who's the winner? Turdsley: It's my turn to say what happened! Ladies and gentleman of the jur''aaaaayyy'' I didn't squish her garden; She's overreacting. I just touched her rosebud. That is all. Jury: Guilty. Guilty, guilty, guilty. Nut: Ladies and gentleman of the jur''aaaaayyy'', you may now decide who is guilty. Jury: whispers Mia: That should be me! Alright, I've had just about enough of this jury! Nut Mia: Listen up, you stupid squirrel thing! If you don't change that law, than I will! Nut: You're...choking...me... gasps Ginger, as a Jury Member: Tuh. Amateurs. Mia: law What do we have here? I'll just add a few modifications of my own. "No Jury" on law Yah! Alright, you fools! It's right there is black and white! So there shall never be a jury in my courtroom again! Jury: Get out of my courtroom, you hypocrites! Jury: and leave Mia: I'm the judge; it's my courtroom; and I say that Turdsley wins! Turdsley: Yaaaaahhh! Birdena: Uh! That doesn't even make sense! I hate this place! I shall get revenge, Judge Mia! to camera Don't you film me! Nut: Uh, what happened, I can't remember anything. What's this? A new law that says no juries allowed? Oh, yes, no jury, no jury... Category:Transcripts Category:Complete transcripts